“I’ve got you, and I’m not letting go!”
These are the words I kept saying to my husband as he lay on the pavement, after flying 25 feet through the air and landing hard on the ground.
We were out on a late afternoon ride through the North Georgia mountains when a young driver made a bad left turn. With no time to get out of the way, Jade hit the truck broadside with his dual sport and went flying. I witnessed the horror from my Scout as I traveled behind him.
When I got to Jade he was badly broken everywhere, trying to keep his breath, in 10 over 10 pain, and terrified! I could barely think. Kneeling beside him, I just kept saying over and over, “I got you Baby, I got you, and I’m not letting go! I’m not letting go!” A year and a half later it keeps coming back to me.
(FYI, Jade is much better, he’s got a little limp and struggles with some aches from time to time, but it’s nothing short of miraculous how strong he is after such a horrible accident!)
I remember thinking that day, “DONNA, now more than ever you NEED to pray!!!!” But all I could do is repeat this same phrase over and over and over. “I got you, I got you Baby and I’m not letting go!”
It's bothered me a lot, "why God? Why couldn't I pray?" I believe He has answered me and I am in awe. Romans 8:26 teaches, "In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words."
The Holy Spirit took over, praying for us both, "I got you. I got you Baby and I'm not letting go!" In that moment, when all I felt was anger at the kid, terror at the thought of losing my husband, GOD, in His extravagant love stepped in, wrapped His almighty arms around us and NEVER let go.
BLOOD ON OUR CLOTHES
Tears streaming down my face, I have another revelation: Galatians 6:1 & 2 in a paraphrase, “...if one of our faithful has fallen … carry each other’s burdens …” .
The following day, after a sleepless night in ICU my husband went into the first of four surgeries. I had some time to process the events and take inventory. Sitting on a couch in the Ronald MacDonald room, I looked down at my jeans. As reality smacked me in the face, I took a picture with my phone. I think I just wanted to see it from a different angle. It seemed very significant. Jades blood was splattered around the knee. I had knelt so close to his broken body, it got all over me.
When we get close to the wounded, we're going to get blood on our clothes.
"I got you Baby, and I'm not letting go!"
We are called to hold the weak; to "bear each others burdens." Sometimes the people God sends are a bloody, broken mess. Getting close means our favorite jeans get stained. It's not pretty, but, it is beautiful. Beautiful in the grace Christ pours out. The strength He supplies. And, the healing He delivers. Jesus held us, I will hold them.
“I got you, I got you Baby, and I’m not letting go!”
I am a wife, to the love of my life, Jade Lewis. I am a mother to three beautiful, creative grown children. I am fur mama to two amazing dogs and one ginormous love bundle cat. I am a "Steel Cowgirl" and my iron horse is a gorgeous Indian Scout 60. But most of all, I am a worshiper. I was created specifically for that purpose. I worship the Creator through and by His Son, Jesus Christ. He is my king, my muse, my passion.